Seems as it's time once again to do the right thing, man up, head on into the garage, and pop the hood on this nigh-abandoned rustbucket blog so we can get her back on the road once more! Yes sir! Gotta make the old man proud!
Besides, I've got to get this Father's Day card out, and I don't want to walk to the post office. Or anywhere.
How-do, neighbor! Hope you too remembered the faces of your fathers (sorry, been reading through Unca Stevie's "The Dark Tower" for the 19th time lately) and got your own cards and/or calls dispatched in time for this year's sire celebrations.
Unlike Mom's Day we've got no cartoon kitties for this parent's picture, as the card in question featured not a pair of cats but a singular bird -- a toucan, resplendent in a 'shopped in tie and jaunty hat, and within bore the message:
"On Father's Day,
just wanted to give you
a little toucan of my gratitude."
Which . . . is not terribly grammatically correct -- shouldn't that be "I just wanted"? But, more importantly, and fittingly, is also just some prime, grade A dad joke material I knew my progenitor would appreciate.
Besides, what son hasn't longed for the opportunity to give his old man the bird just once:
. . . or maybe twice?
Or -- squinting in for a closer look with our aging quatrogenarian eyes -- why not three times while we're at it?:
Well, pluck me -- so I did.
Ah, well, no worries; this is my old man we're talking about here -- the one who gifted me with the corny kernel seeds of my own sadistic sense of humor -- and I'm sure he'll accept these facetious flip-offs in the spirit in which they were given.
And so, in closing, and to quote my own inscription:
This bird's for you, Dad -- Happy Father's Day, from your firstborn featherbrain!